It’s Me. I’m Some Dance Moms.

“Oh my God, you’re so funny!”

I get that once in a while. When I meet new people, I usually try to lighten the mood with a joke of some kind. And sometimes, the quip will strike the right cord with a person enough for them to consider me to be humorous. I credit my late father with my quick wit; the words weren’t even fully out of the other person’s mouth before he let a snarky comment rip. I grew up on healthy doses of sarcasm (sarcastic people are more intelligent, right?), and worked to keep up with my father’s jibes throughout my childhood. 

Double-Edged Sword

But as with most things, my sense of humor can be both a blessing and a curse. Since I enjoy entertaining others and making them smile, I tend to share the jokes that pop into my mind. But sometimes, I would be better off if those wisecracks never make their way past my lips. If I’m being honest, some of my thoughts can be downright cutting, dripping with snark. Those are the remarks that I make an effort to keep in the lonely residence of my headspace. 

But I’m not always successful at keeping them reigned in. I might deem them too funny NOT to share, or I might be trying to lighten the mood. In the course of a normal day, my tendency to spread these little tidbits of sunshine around doesn’t cause too many problems (aside from withering stares and eye rolls directed my way). If my fiance is nearby, he might shoot me an exasperated look or smack his forehead with his palm (hey, he knew what he was in for when he popped the question).

My Life as a Dance Coach

Back in the day, I was the head coach and choreographer for both youth and high school dance teams. Part of what made me an effective contributor was my ability to critically evaluate a piece, and to correct things that were “off” before they hit the stage. I would intensely pore over videos of our performances to search for flaws, hell-bent on eliminating anything that could result in a lowered score. Priding myself on being a great “cleaner,” my goal was always to have each of my girls look like mirror images of each other.

As the years passed, we began to incorporate more proper technical training into our sessions. We worked tirelessly to improve our team’s technique, consistently giving and applying corrections. Having done all of this for over a decade, I have a fairly good idea of what I’m looking at when a routine takes the stage. 

My Partner in Crime

For years after she “graduated” from my team, my sister Jamie served as one of my assistant coaches. She had taken classes at a local dance school as well, so she also has developed the ability to critically assess a dance routine. Jamie, however, is a bit less forgiving in her evaluations than I am, and tends to speak her mind more freely. So when the two of us sit together in an audience (and there’s no one in our immediate area), all bets are off.

Reigning It In

My time and experience as a teacher has helped me to grow a pretty reliable filter when other people are within earshot. But I can’t help the musings that automatically come to mind. For example, we’ve had a couple of wardrobe malfunctions in the past few years (see To Top It All Off, Part 1 and Part 2). Let’s just say that none of my thoughts were of the G-rated kind.